Hello, and welcome to the first monthly Q & A with Kay at Dressed for My Day. I’m so glad you stopped by. Feel free to settle in with something good to drink, and let’s chat a few minutes. Today I’m answering questions from my readers…that’s you! So thank you to those of you who submitted this diverse set of questions. Here we go!
How tall are you?
Yes, I started with the easiest one! I’m 5’8″. Welp, that about covers that one!
Why do you apply your eye shadow first and not your foundation?
Ha, ha! This question made me laugh because the answer is so silly really. I mentioned in this previous beauty post that I apply my eye shadow first thing. I didn’t always do that. But a few years ago when I was preparing to shoot video teaching sessions for my Bible study Joseph – Keeping a Soft Heart in a Hard Place, I got a makeup lesson from my friend and photographer Hannah. She had just learned makeup application tips from another photographer who used to be a makeup artist. And that woman taught Hannah to apply eye shadow first. I don’t really know why, and Hannah didn’t know why either. But Hannah did remark that applying your eye makeup first allows you to clean up any stray shadow or liner when you’re applying your foundation.
Well, of course, I’m a rules follower, so I wanted to do it just like Hannah taught me. So I did, and I still do. However, a few months ago Hannah did my makeup for another photo shoot and she applied my foundation first. Ha!
Still, I’ve stuck with this routine for the past two years, and it works for me. So I guess it’s kind of like the story of the woman who always cut off the end of her ham before putting it in the oven to bake. When her husband asked her why she did that she said it was because her mother and grandmother always did that. Long story short, eventually the woman found out that the only reason grandmother cut off the end of her ham before baking it was because she didn’t have a long enough pan to accommodate the whole ham Ha!
My question for Saturday’s Q&A is about your church. Would you be willing to share the name or location of the new church?
Sure, I love talking about my church. Thank you for asking. My husband and I along with about 40 other people launched a new church in mid-July I believe it was. Our church is called High Desert Bible Church and it’s located in Sierra Vista, Arizona, which is in the high desert. We are a non-denominational church (for now at least), but we are an evangelical church that teaches the Bible. We meet on Sunday mornings as a full congregation, and then we have small home groups on Sunday evenings and other evenings of the week. Our church is multi-ethnic and we have a full range of ages represented, with lots of children, youth, young adults, median adults and seniors. Everybody works at our church. It’s all hands on deck every Sunday because we meet in a temporary location. We have a blast. You can check out our church’s website here and you can even watch our service on Facebook here. Oh, and my husband is the pastor and we’ve grown to about 80-100 attenders since July.
I love my church!
You have such beautiful hair! Could you tell us more about the products you use and how you style your hair? Maybe more about going grey?
Hee, hee! Again I laugh. Kinda. I definitely appreciate the two of you who commented on my hair and told me you like it. Truthfully, I’ve been getting compliments on my hair for about 13 years now. That’s how long I’ve lived in Arizona, you see. The secret to my hair? I live in Arizona!!!
No kidding. I have great skin when I’m in Georgia, but great hair when I’m in Arizona.
But the climate aside, I have a bigger problem with my hair that I’ve not yet mentioned on this blog, I think. I lost a good bit of hair this spring. I think it was hormonal. All sorts of stuff is going on hormonally, you know. We’ll leave it at that. But the hair loss was real. Then it stopped shedding so fast, but then it seemed to pick up again just recently. So, ugh!
Y’all, I’ve always had a full head of hair, and I do mean FULL. So losing hair has been a little scary for me. Have any of you experienced this? Would you like for me to research this and post about it sometime?
Meanwhile, I will tell you a few things about how I style my hair:
- I change up my shampoo and conditioner frequently, just using what I like that I can find at Target really. Nothing special.
- I only wash my hair once, maybe twice per week. Again, I live in Arizona, y’all.
- After it air dries considerably…almost completely dry…I dry it one layer at a time with a big round bristled brush, dividing it into three layers.
- Between drying the layers, I use a flat iron to completely straighten it. It’s really already straight as I dry it, but the flat iron helps it have a shiny sheen and keeps it from getting all puffy.
- After drying and flat ironing, I use a very small dab of Biosilk Therapy Oil to make it silky and shiny.
- Then I spray it with just a little Big Sexy Hair Spray & Play. ‘Cause, y’all, I definitely want big, sexy hair. Hee, hee!
- I get my hair trimmed about every 8-10 weeks by my friend in Marilyn, who does a wonderful job at a sweet price. And she adds a few highlights about every 3 to 5 months. I’m very low maintenance with my hair.
For more of my thoughts on hair styles and care for women 50+ (as asked for by one reader) you might want to review this post I wrote back in May: 5 Body Parts Making You Look Older than You Really Are.
I have a wedding to attend in Boston this winter. I wore this dress to a wedding in Phoenix this spring. Can I wear it in Boston? Please advise. (see attached photos)
Kim, I think your dress is lovely and perfectly suitable for a wedding in Boston in the winter. Of course, you will want to wear a warm coat with it, something dressy and elegant. I would suggest something like this black wool coat with the faux fur collar. Or this one would be equally suitable, and you could add an elegant black cashmere scarf.
You’ll want to change up your accessories, too, to make them more winter-appropriate. I’d wear suede or patent leather pumps, or some in a pretty metallic, like these. I’d also probably wear hose to match the shoes, either sheer black or a pretty taupe if you wear the metallic pumps. Of course, you don’t have to wear hosiery. Then I’d carry a bag in velvet or suede or satin, something more wintery than you may have carried in the spring wedding.
Finally, you’ll probably want a pretty wrap to wear with the dress when you’re not wearing the coat. So you can go with something that has faux fur or something in cashmere, satin or other rich fabric.
I’ve provided a shopping widget with ideas below. Hope that helps. It’s a beautiful dress. And you certainly can wear it this winter!
How do you navigate the trends? Knowing when to buy and how much to spend? I don’t want to spend a lot of money on trendy or faddish things, but I don’t want to look out of the loop either.
This is such a good question. And actually several readers asked a variation of this question. I’ve really learned so much about shopping wisely this year. My husband was without a job most of the year, and our income is now half of what it was, so I have to be very careful about how I spend my clothing budget.
Here are my tips for shopping the trends:
- Shop for you wardrobe essentials first. If you don’t have the wardrobe basics for your style aesthetic, you won’t have anything to wear the trends with anyhow. So put your focus, your time and your money on the staples. My subscribers have access to two Wardrobe Essentials checklists in the Freebies for Subscribers page: one for fall/winter and one for spring/summer.
- Know the trends. You can’t really make wise choices about buying and wearing the trends unless you know what they are. So stay informed. Of course, I try to help you with that here. If you’re not subscribed to my email list so you won’t miss a post, let’s take care of that here.
- Only consider purchasing trending items that you really love. You don’t have to wear anything you don’t like, anything that doesn’t fit your style aesthetic, anything that makes you feel uncomfortable or anything that you fear will not be around long. For instance, I’m passing (so far) on the sock booties, the big fringe earrings and balloon sleeves. There’s nothing wrong with those trends; I’m just not into them.
- If you want to participate in a trend, but it’s not worth much investment to you, go small…very small. For instance, lavender has really been in for over a year now. But it’s just not a favorite color on me. So I purchased a simple lavender t-shirt from Target for a song. And I stopped my lavender trend right there, thank you very much.
- If you want to…spend more on the trends that are not fads. There actually is a difference between a trend and a fad. A trend is something that is especially hot right now. It’s trending. But it may actually be a staple that is really making a big splash. For instance, current “trends” that are also timeless staples include corduroys, animal prints, the color brown and plaids. Those aren’t going anywhere. You’ll always be able to wear them, but they are especially hot right now. On the other hand, fads are here now and gone tomorrow. Heel styles, earrings styles, unique colors, novelty prints (including camo probably) and scrunchies, those are fads. So, bottom line, spend more money on trends that also have staying power, but spend less on faddish trends.
- Put a toe in before you jump in. If you think you’re interested in a trend, but don’t know if you can wear it successfully or confidently, try it out with a low price, small item first. For instance, probably three years ago I ventured into the animal print trend with some leopard print ballet slippers from Target (great store for trying out trends on a budget!). I enjoyed wearing them for a couple of years, but this year, having some experience wearing this animal print, I was ready to take the plunge and buy some nicer shoes (similar) and a mid-range leopard print hand bag. I’ve not regretted either purchase one bit and I’ve enjoyed them thoroughly. I expect to enjoy them for many more years, too.
- Give yourself a fixed budget for trends, and don’t go over it. There’s really no need to spend exorbitantly on trendy items. You can dress beautifully without them. And honestly, while I’m all for following and wearing the trends, I think we older gals need to be wary of overdoing them. Wearing too much trendy clothing makes us look like we’re trying too hard. And we ain’t!
- Stick with your style aesthetic. I think this is perhaps my most important tip. If the trend does not fit into your style aesthetic, your style essence, then stay away from it. In the end, you won’t wear it and you’ll wish you hadn’t wasted money on it. That’s why this classic dressing gal isn’t purchasing any fringe thread earrings.
My final question was about how to build a wardrobe for a new life season. But, because I’ve already gone so long and because so many of us experience shifts in life stages at our ages, I think I’ll make that a separate post. How’s that?
Thanks so much for the questions, ladies. I’ll tackle more next month!
My Nordstrom Fall Sale Picks
Below I’m sharing my 20 under $100 picks from the Nordstrom Fall Sale. The sale extends until November 18, but sizes and color choices are already diminishing. I tried to include several items that I’ve shared with you before as well as some new-to-me items.
Here are 20 great finds at the Nordstrom Fall Sale…less than $100!
Going clockwise, starting in the top left corner:
The Sam Edelman Packer booty is a great price and such a nice basic booty for this fall and winter.
The J. Crew balloon sleeve turtleneck sweater in Dublin green would make a pretty Christmas present for a daughter or daughter-in-law.
The pretty colors in this ribbed lettuce edge striped sweater make it fun and bright for a dreary winter day.
These crystal huggie hoop earrings would make an elegant selection for that holiday affair you’ll be dressing up for.
If you’re tired of me going on and on about my favorite gold layering necklace from Talbots (hee, hee!) you might prefer this graduated gold sphere necklace instead.
The Dani suede and leather pouch is a nice, everyday clutch option for a handbag. And the price is right.
The BP Ruana Plaid Scarf is a sweet option for you or a gift for a friend.
The Hawna Faux Leather Tote in metallic could add a little sparkle to your wardrobe at a sweet price.
The J. Crew Balloon Sleeve Turtleneck comes in a pretty pink or a dark crimson.
The Junie Genuine Calf Hair Leopard print pump is a little lower heeled than the ones I have. These are a sweet option, and now they’re under $100.
The buttery yellow skivvy stripe sweater looks lightweight but classic. And it’s less than $25!
The Sanctuary Amare Shaker sweater, shown here in pink, comes in five other great shades.
The Caslon Off Duty Knit Cardigan would be perfect over joggers or jeans. It’s casual, but soft and luxurious.
I love this buttery yellow Scotch and Soda Stripe Crewneck Sweater.
You may recognize the Marc Fisher Zala pump as the ones I’ve worn in this post, among others. I love these pumps and wear them at least once a week. They’re finally reduced, and they come in several shades and patterns.
My Sam Edelman leopard print flats are sold out, but these are comparable, and they’re reduced!!
These Barefoot Dreams cardis are all the rage. And for good reason. They are incredibly soft and cozy. This cardi is perfect for wearing with your pjs, your joggers and t-shirt or even with jeans.
Finally, the J. Crew Leopard Print Cardigan would look great over most any color of tee or tank, and it would pair well with jeans or dress pants.
The Weekend’s Sales Worth Checking Out:
Besides Nordstrom, there are other retailers hosting great sales this weekend.
Talbots still has select items marked down up to 40% off, with an additional 30% off.
At Ann Taylor you’ll get 40% off your entire purchase with code FRIENDS40. I tried on some beautiful holiday party pieces there today and will be sharing them in a try-on session post on Monday.
Likewise, you’ll get 40% off your purchase at Loft with code WORKIT.
Banana Republic is also giving you 40% off your purchase.
J. Crew is giving you 30% off with code FRIENDS, but if you’re a rewards member you’ll get 35% off with code FAMILY. Ha!
At Gap, online only, they are giving you up to 50% off everything with an additional 20% off with code EXTRA.
With code 29332 you’ll get 25% off your purchase at Chico’s.
Check out Lands’ End for 50% off their full price outwear and 40% off all other full price styles with code STORM and pin 7424.
Vera Bradley has 25% off select travel styles.
J.Jill is giving you 30% off your purchase with code GATHER30.
Have a great weekend!
Blessed for My Day
My husband’s really the gardener between us, but I know enough about growing things to not plant in bad soil. For instance, I can tell when the soil in which my African violets have been planted becomes old and lacking. In order for living things to grow vibrantly there must be good, nutritious soil. Likewise, our hearts cannot grow in godliness when we have allowed contaminates into the soil of our lives. Perhaps today would be a good day to assess the soil of our lives. Have we allowed roots of bitterness to grow among the gentle seedlings God has planted? Do we have sin creeping in, maybe those that we have excused so often we no longer even recognize them as sins? Gossip, criticism, meddling, controlling, worrying, etc.? If we want the fruit of God’s Spirit to grow freely and lavishly in our lives, we will have to keep the soil of our hearts tilled and free of sinful debris.
For thus says the Lord to the men of Judah and to Jerusalem, “Break up your fallow ground, And do not sow among thorns.”
Today’s post includes affiliate links. These are for your shopping convenience and they help me earn an income. Thank you so much for shopping through my links. It does not cost you anything at all to help support what I do here. I appreciate you!
I had to laugh when you said the secret to your hair was living in Arizona. My hair always did so well when we would visit my daughter who lived in Chandler. I too have been dealing with thinning hair the last few years. I’ve read that not coloring your hair helps some so I’m in the process of letting my color grow off. Not sure I’m going to like it but we’ll see. Would be interested in a post on thinning hair.
Yes, I’m really not coloring mine very often either anymore. Thanks for sharing ?
I too have been dealing with thinning hair for the last 1 1/2 yrs. I’ve always had plenty of hair, so it was scary for me too. I had a scalp biopsy performed. The result was telogen effluvium, which is when the shedding phase of hair goes into overdrive. It can be brought on my stress, hormones, diet, and weight loss. I fit into all of those catagories, so I wasn’t able to narrow it down to the exact culprit. My dermatologist said I would not go bald, which is a relief and that this was temporary. Hope this helps.
Hi Shannon. Yes, that helps a lot. I have experienced all of those things as well, so that really explains a lot even if I can’t narrow it down to one. Thanks for sharing! ?
Oh my goodness too funny Kay! Ok so nowadays I apply foundation first if the eyeshadow is going to be very light and there isn’t going to be much fallout. If I do a bit more eyeshadow and play up the eyes than I do that first. It’s easier to clean up the face that way. Who knows what I was doing back then!!!!! LOL
Try biotin for the thinning hair and brittle nails. Works wonders for me!
I experienced hair loss about 12 years ago. I was in my 40’s, and thought it was my thyroid. My doctor discovered anemia – which, after further testing, led to a diagnosis of celiac disease. After going on a gluten free diet, my hair loss resolved, as did many other symptoms. All this to say that if your hair loss doesn’t slow down, I would recommend a good check up with a physician. It might be a temporary thing – but it might be something that needs checking out. Thanks so much for your blog. I am enjoying reading it and do appreciate your advice and style.